In The House

Like a cartoon spy, you sneak on tippy-toes toward the apparently vacant house, desperate to cover your naked form. While comfortable with your body, you realize your escape from the police will be hampered by the unique nature of your exposed genitals. A disguise is needed. Uncertain of how to actually break into a house, with fingers crossed, you try the most obvious option – the back door. You grab the knob and turn slowly, expecting the worst, but it opens without effort. You take a tentative step inside the unlit entryway.

Fearing vigilante justice from some gun-toting nut, you say “Hello?” with a quavering voice. No one answers. Gaining courage, you repeat the greeting more loudly: “Hello?” Nothing. Slowly, you creep down the hallway, looking in each passing room for a sign of clothing. A ray of light shines from a crack in the door at the end of the hall; approaching slowly, you push it open.

A smell like thrift store balloons and cinnamon hits you in the face. The room is littered with bits of clothing. Every surface is covered – jackpot. “Must be a girl’s room,” you mutter. This is good because you generally prefer wearing women’s clothing. You hastily put on the first thing you find that fits, which happens to be a linen nightgown festooned with tiny faded-blue flowers and an aged Victorian lace trim. You feel great. Celebrating with a little spin you flip your hair coyly and admire the elegant bit of sleepwear.

The sound of keys in the front door interrupts your enthusiastic modeling. Peering through the window, you see three people entering the home. Once again, panic sinks its cold teeth into your heart; time to get out of this awkward and potentially harmful situation post-haste. As footsteps approach outside the room, you try the window but it seems to be stuck. The only other thing you can think of is to hide under the bed – like a bad gag in a romantic comedy movie. The door to the room slowly opens…

HIDING UNDER THE BED – CLICK HERE
A WINDOW WITH A VIEW – CLICK HERE